First of all, I went back to the doctor today. Everything’s fine. I was a little annoyed at the exam, but don’t feel like writing about that right now.
Anyway, PMS has reared it’s ugly head again, and I’m hating my husband. I mean seriously, seriously doubting why I married him. Maybe I really have made a mistake in marrying him. How do you know when you’ve made the worst mistake of your life? I mean I hate every fiber of his body right now. Is this just PMS? I’ve been bitchy and mean to him all day, and he is just bitchy and mean right back. He fixed the shoji that the cat and Sara tore this evening, and told me to move the sofa so he could put the screen back up. I told him he should say please instead of just ordering me around.
Him: “Ii kagen chiho no kotoba ni narete” (Fucking get used to the dialect here already).
Me: “Ii kagen eigo wo oboete!” (Fucking hurry up and learn English already!)
Him: “Sou iu iikata da to zettai oboenai!” (If you put it like that then there’s no way I’m going to learn!)
Me: “Ja watashi mo zettai kono inaka no kotoba ni narenai!” (Then I’m not going to get used to the fucking hick language they use around here!”
Him: “Ja, ii yo!” (That’s fucking fine with me!)
If you ask me, saying please and thank you, especially when he knows I’m already out for blood, is just simple courtesy, and has nothing to do with local dialects because they do in fact use please and thank you in Nagano too. (asshole!) Plus, he was the one who used the nasty way of speaking with me first, then when I use the exact same words back at him he gets a stick up his ass about it. Why did I marry this man? If I had somewhere, anywhere, I could run away to at this moment I would. I have thought about getting a hotel room numerous times tonight, but I don’t want to spend the money (I hate the bastard, but I’m still cheap). I would love to send him back to his parents house, but I would rather not involve them in this.
Fuck! Crap! Shit! Why do I feel like the only one stuck in a shithole marriage with an asshole husband and totally utterly alone in the world? I am hating my life and hating my husband, and the only thing that is keeping me from completely losing it is the fact that Sara is with me and I don’t like to cry in front of her.