Today I took Amelie into the big hospital again for a check-up. Basically it was to make sure I’ve been putting the leg braces on her correctly and that they are doing the trick. No problems there. Doing well. We have another appointment in late August when she’ll get X-rayed again to see if her pelvic bone has opened up more, and hopefully the braces will have done their job and she won’t have to wear them any longer than that.
HOWEVER, I asked the doctor to look at her elbow for me, and here’s where the very shocking problem lies. I can’t remember when I first noticed it, but something about Amelie’s right elbow has never seemed quite right to me (no pun intended). It didn’t seem to bother her though and she uses her right hand just fine and waves it all around, but something just didn’t didn’t seem quite right. So last week when I had my appointment with my chiropractor, I asked her to take a look at Amelie’s arm and tell me what she thought. She too thought something seemed not quite right. Amelie wouldn’t straighten her arm out all the way, and she would pull her arm away when the chiropractor tried to touch her elbow, but it didn’t look or seem dislocated, just not quite right. It was still around 11a.m. so I decided to take her into the pediatrician’s office before they closed for the morning.
The pediatrician starts off by telling me it’s okay if babies have an unbalanced range of motion in their arms when they’re this little yet. He then looks at her elbows and says “You’re right. Something may be wrong. ” He said that it didn’t seem to be bothering her though and it wasn’t an emergency where I needed to run out and have x-rays done on her right away, but that I should mention it to the doctor the next time I took her in to see the orthopedic specialist for her leg braces, which was today. I tell Akinori about all this, as he hasn’t noticed anything wrong before and all of a sudden he’s like “You’re right! Something’s funny! I wonder if it’s dislocated. I wonder if Sara pulled her arm too strong. I wonder…I wonder…” Over and over and over. Driving me up the fucking wall. I don’t know!!! That’s why I want to take her to a doctor! Asking ME the same question over and over will only get you the same answer, I DON’T KNOW!!! as well as piss me off because although I know he doesn’t mean to insinuate it is somehow my fault, I can’t help but hear it that way. Why do mothers always blame themselves?
Anyway, legs are checked and everything is fine. Then I ask about her elbow. The doctor looks at it and asks me what I think is wrong with it and I explain that she doesn’t fully extend her right arm, or the range of motion seems to be somewhat limited. He looks at it, and tells me I am in fact, correct. Not what I was hoping to hear. He suggested that we have x-rays taken of her arm the next time we go back to the hospital in August for her legs. I asked if waiting until August meant that it was not an emergency situation, and the doctor said she hasn’t been injured, so no it’s not an emergency, but if I had time we could do the x-rays now if I wanted. So we did.
Not sure now if I regret having them done then and there or not. The doctor called us back in and had an orthopedic arm specialist come in as well. Amelie’s radius and ulna should be two completely separate bones, but on her right arm, they are fused together at the elbow, which is limiting her range of motion in her arm. The doctor said that this was not completely uncommon, but obviously it is not something that is too common or they would check for it at the health checks like they do with hip displacement. Googling the condition “Congenital radio-ulnar synostosis” doesn’t really help put my mind at ease. So far anything I’ve found on the subject leads me to believe that nothing can be done, and this is something that Amelie will have to learn to live with. It’s just a matter of severity. I don’t know if finding it this early can change anything. From what I’ve found on the internet it seems that most people don’t catch it until they are at least a few years old.
I left the hospital with all of these questions and in tears, so I went to the midwife clinic where I gave birth to Amelie because it is on the way home from the hospital, and they are all nurses, so I thought maybe they would have heard of this type of thing before since it is supposedly not so rare, and could give me some information. But none of them had ever heard of it. They were kind though, as they always are, and listened to me and asked me to keep them informed on Amelie’s progress. I left feeling better, but Dr. Google has kind of made me feel worse. Our next appointment is August 23rd. That is SOOOOOO far away! How am I going to keep sane until then?